Saturday, October 24, 2009

Death of Billy Simms





The Death of Billy Simms



“Vengeance is Mine!” sayeth the Lord, but I knew I could never comply

So I chased the man called Billy Sims to the edge of the Arctic sky.
From far out on the prairies, to the rim of perpetual ice
I tracked the thief  who’d stolen the heart, of my young and beautiful wife.

For a year I had trailed this murderous wretch, a year where I suffered and bled
Knowing I’d follow his thieving hide, no matter where his trail led.
From ninety above, to sixty below, I stayed on the wandering track
Of Billy Sims, and the hate was so strong, I knew I could never turn back.

From my beautiful farm to the edge of hell, he raced in heedless flight
Trying to run from the crimes he’d done, that violent sin filled night.
The tracks had led from my homestead bed, to the edge of the Arctic ice,
Not Billy’s alone that staggered on, but also those of my wife.

By the fire at night, I sat alone and stared into the leaping flames
Exhausted in body and mindless of all but the sound of his thieving name.
“Billy Sims, Billy Sims” was all I could hear o’er the sound of the frozen wind
And his death was all that I dreamed of-- and the way I would do him in.

Through endless miles of lonely trail, in a land that seemed frozen and dead
I cared nothing at all for the endless pain but thought of revenge instead.
At night as I lay in my goose-down, and the ice of the river cracked
I saw in my mind the bloody end of the perfidious pair I tracked.

In front of me they ran for their lives, and the tracks told me the tale
Of a thieving man, and a woman who ran, to live with him on the trail.
A tale as old as hell itself, of love betrayed and spurned
And I followed on, each frozen dawn, while the need for vengeance burned.

The tundra was endless, a frozen waste, and the air was thick with frost
The nights were as black as the thoughts I held, but I cared not what the cost
I’d find this pair and in despair he’d gasp out his last breath.
This Billy Simms who’d stolen my life, and left me close to death.

And often my mind returned to my farm, and all that I once held dear.
A life of love and happiness far south on the western frontier
Where we’d carved a life in the prairie’s sod,  my beautiful wife and I
And now she’d run off with Billy Simms, after leaving me there to die.

And while I followed that endless trail, I dreamed of how it would end
I’d find their camp and walk right up and shoot him again and again.
I dreamed of the look in his thieving eyes as he saw me raise my gun
And my lips would curl in a frozen snarl, and I’d whip my dogs to a run.

Week after week, and month after month, I followed the trail ahead
‘Til it became the focus of my life, and I cared not where it led.
Winding down  the frozen rivers, climbing the mountain crests
I knew only the heat of my revenge, and cared nothing of food nor rest.

And then one day as I pushed the sleigh up a ridge, then started down
I noticed a haze in the distant sky, and the lights of a little town.
I whipped the dogs ‘til they cried and whined; Billy’s tracks led arrow straight
Right into that frozen hamlet, and up to the Mountie’s gate.

“Where is that thieving yellow dog!” I yelled as I pushed inside
“I aim to blow his brains out, and nail up his yellow hide!”
It was gloomy in that little room, and awful hard to see
But I heard the click of a scattergun and I saw it was aimed at me.

The Mountie stood with his back to the wall, a shotgun in his hand
His Red Serge suit was cleaned and pressed, his face was leather tanned.
He stood six-four, and he blocked the door that led to the only cell
And from the gloom in that other room came Billy’s terrified yell…

“Shoot him! Shoot him” Billy cried, “I’m telling you that’s him!
 He’s the guy who’s dogged my trail! Now he’s trying to do me in!
 My wife and I don’t know the guy! I fear he’s quite insane!
 He’s put us both through hell and back! So shoot him! Then shoot him   
 again!”

 The Mountie’s shotgun never moved, his eyes stayed upon my face
“Now perhaps you’ll want to tell me friend, what’s your part in this race?
 But first—and very carefully-- set your rifle on the floor
 Or this scattergun will send you backwards through that entry door.”

All I could think of at the time were the months I’d tracked them down
Of endless miles through frozen waste, which led finally to this town.
The months of lonely campfires; the winter’s deadly chill;
The endless burning for revenge on this man I’d come to kill.

“The man you have inside your jail is a liar through and through
He tried to kill me, stole my wife, then stole my lead-dog too!
He’s nothing but a thieving skunk—and worse-- that I’ve observed.

Now, if you’ll kindly step aside, he’ll get what he deserves!”


‘No! don’t let him near me!” Billy hollered, petrified. 
“He’s mad! I tell you! Gone quite mad! Don’t let him here inside!
I don’t know why this man pursues me, and wants to take my life
But if he’ll agree, instead of me, he can have back his little wife!”

The Mountie kind of blinked at that, but still he blocked the door
Then from the cell room came a thud as something hit the floor
Who would have thought… that gentle gal…Why, bless the little tart!
She’d taken out her jackknife and stabbed Billy though the heart.

Now all that happened years ago, but the memory never dims
And I often sit and ponder ‘bout the death of Billy Simms.
 I never can quite understand, how come Billy hadn’t learned
That you cannot trust a woman scorned, when ‘ere your back is turned!

© Rick Mortimer
~~~~~~~~~~                             ~~~~~~~~~~                      ~~~~~~~~~~



It is interesting to me tonight, to be sitting here in a warm room on the B.C. coast, listening to the rain pouring down and thinking of those cold cold nights by the campfire in the Yukon while out on the trapline. Sometimes I'd just sit, wrapped in a big parka, staring into the roaring flames, and recite Robert Service. 
    Some of those nights were awful long and cold, and I guess they all went into writing the story of Billy Simms above.
  I now wonder , "How many times did Sam McGee get cremated in those years?"   And so too, I wonder how many times Billy Simms is doomed to be chased and hunted down, only to be stabbed through the heart by his one-time Sweetheart?

  


  




Thursday, October 22, 2009

There is Peace in This

 

  You know, this whole thing about God...  

    We seem to go through life trying to please Him and do the things we know He would want us to do.  (when I say WE  I mean ME).  We feel that we want to follow God, but we seem to not be able to make 'it' work for us.  Why are we so tired?  Broke? Relationship poor?  Sad, depressed, sick?
   I'm no wise guy on the top of the pyramid, but here's what I have found out.
  I was raised to go to church (the Anglican Church) and was baptized and confirmed there.  I got out in the world knowing God existed.  And shamefully, that was about all I knew about Him.  Oh, I knew I was supposed to do the things He wanted me to do, but nobody ever seemed to talk about just how I was supposed to do that.  Mind you, 'they' were quick to inform me that if I did not do those things that God demanded I do, then my butt was going to get fried like a chicken on Col Sanders Ranch.  The whole thing became so unworkable to me, and the world so inviting to me, that I just quit trying to do anything that I felt was required of me.  Oh, I kept my moral values and all that because after all...right is right, right?  I knew right from wrong, and didn't steal, lie, or murder anyone.  Actually, I don't think I ever really intentionally tried to hurt anyone.  But I sure was not doing anything I was doing because I was trying to please God. 
   God?  he was just a big bossy guy in the sky who kept trying to stop me from having fun.  If someone asked, I'd say I was a Christian - I had no problem with that - but I sure had a problem with living like one.   I just ignored or 'chucked out' the whole idea of even trying.
  Now I know why.   I have really been studying this whole thing about 'being under the Law' and 'being under Grace'.

  In the book of Romans, Paul lays it all out.  The Law was never given for us to follow in the first place.  It was given to condemn us!  If you look at the whole law (not just the 10 commandments) in the book of Leviticus, you will see thousands of them.  There is no way that man -any man- can live up to them all.  It is impossible to do.  That was the purpose of the Law--to show man just how vile he really became after the 'fall'.  (Adam's deal with the devil).   Look at it in this light:
   If you were 20 yrs old, and just got a brand new mustang car with a big V-8 in it!  Yahoo!  Down the highway you bomb in it, top off, music blaring, and a laughing friend beside you!  You are both having a ball! What could be better?  You're doing 95 MPH down a great road, passing people left and right, waving and singing in your bright orange hot-rod! Yahooo!    Now, you take in a small corner and suddenly there it is -- a sign put there by the authorities that says you can only legally drive at 55 MPH  (not the 95 you are!).   Speed zone? What's a speed zone?  You have never heard of a speed zone in your life!  Do you mean to say that if I drive over 55 MPH I am breaking the Law?  Oh man!  What a bummer!
   So what is your first reaction?  (after all..you're doing 95 here!)
Well, you will probably hit the brakes first of all..until you get this matter cleared up, because you are a good person and do like to do the 'right' thing, right? 
 You look ahead as your car slows and you see a police car ahead!   How do you feel right at that moment?  
  probably fearful.  apprehensive  at the least wouldn't you say?  After all, you are breaking the Law.  Out of ignorance of the law maybe, but still you know you are/were in the wrong.  The cop is not exactly your friend at the moment, is he?
  So, you get slowed in time. You drive past the cop without getting a fine. 
Now what?   You are probably not going to enjoy the ride as much as you previously were, because of a couple of things;
  1. you've lost the freedom you just had to drive as you please
  2. you are now under condemnation...you were breaking the law!
  3. You want to go fast now but can't.  You feel almost resentful, but upset none the less.
  4. You are upset with the police now. Instead of them being the helpful 'friends' you always saw them as before, they have now become the punishers.  They control your actions.  You want to go fast, they say go slow...
  So then, the main result of the speed sign was condemnation.  If you now drive at even a paltry 60 MPH, -not the 55 that the LAW allows -you do so feeling guilty all the while.  And you really do not want to see a policeman either.

The sign is like the Law, and that policeman you are now NOT wanting to see, is like God in this little made up scenario.  Before, we liked God and always said 'Hello' to Mr. Policeman because He was our friend.  Now though, we avoid Him because we know that we are breaking the Law.  or at least desire to!  I don't like driving at 55 when I could be doing 95!  dang!
   That is sort of a good example of what the Law did, and what it is for.
But it also goes deeper than that.  The law showed us our sinful nature.  The Law said to us "This is how you should live."  You who so piously think you're Holy.  This Law is the standard that God says meets the criteria of being Holy.  Live up to it then, all you who claim to be Holy!
  And of course, no one ever could.  It is just to rigid.  And so we lived in condemnation, because the Law was all about OUR efforts in trying to meet the requirements, and our WORKS can never measure up to God's standard of Holiness.   
  So we tried, failed. Tried failed, tried failed, tried failed, for years!  and all the while we wanted to do what was right and all the while we live under the fear of the policeman. Because condemnation brings fear, and we knew we could never fulfill the requirements of the LAW.
  So some of us just gave up trying.  In my own case I guess I just rationalized it into a thought process something like "If I live morally, and try my best, believe that God and His Son are up there somewhere, then I will still get to ride the bus to Heaven."  Well, that is not what the book says...

    One of the saddest things to my mind, is that this seems to be what the churches of today are saying also.  And in the meantime they keep hitting me with the law and all that condemnation.  It is all OLD TESTAMENT stuff!  That is living by the LAW. 

  Skip to the day when Jesus was Resurrected.  He gave us a whole new treaty.  A new covenant.  A New will and Testament.  He told us that we no longer had to meet the requirements of the Law (unless we chose to).  He defeated Satan for us and we no longer have to fear death and forms of death (like condemnation, poverty, sickness, fear and doubt, etc.)   He has created a whole new species of man wherein we have Himself living inside of us to guide and help us.  He gave us a whole book of instructions on how to do this.  He gave us many teachers to learn from, the greatest of whom is Himself in the form of the Holy Spirit.  And the Father told us that now we are forgiven of all our sins and live under His GRACE. 

  Grace is the state we are in when we are given unconditional love.  We cannot earn God’s Grace.  He gives it freely to us because he is a loving Father and we are his children.  The Law requires you to earn your way to God’s favour; Grace says you are favoured no matter what ‘works’ you do – or don’t do.  No matter how ‘Holy’ you live, you can never earn your way to God’s company through your own works as noted above.  You may be ‘less of a sinner’ than others you know, but who wants to be the ‘best’ sinner in Hell?

   John 3:16 says it all:  "For God so loved the world, that He GAVE his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on Him shall not perish, but everlasting life."   God sent Jesus to save the world, not just Christians Everyone and anyone, who would accept His Son.
  But there is a 'catch' to it, if you will.  Even though we were/are forgiven, we are still children of Adam and therefore of a sinful nature.  God still had to deal with the issue of sin, because He -being Holy - cannot condone or commune with sin.  Yet no one of us can live without sinning; so how then would God ever commune with us?
  Jesus took care of that whole issue by becoming sin for us and paying the price of forgiveness for us.  Redeemed us to the Father just like we would buy back so many precious jewels from the pawnbroker.
  When you are reborn, you become a whole new 'creature'.  A creature never before seen on this earth, because we reborn followers of Jesus (Christians), have a whole new spirit.  This spirit is then sealed and 'translated into the Kingdom of His Dear Son.' (Col 1;10)    So now, any time I find myself in sin, I can go to the Father and through my advocate (lawyer) Jesus Christ, I can be made clean or whole again.  But the important thing here is  that whenever I sin, the filth of it never touches my spirit!  My spirit is sealed and is in the Heavenly Kingdom.  Since we are Spirit, Soul, and Body, this leaves my body and my mind for me to deal with here on this earth.  Our soul, is that part of us which is not body or spirit; this includes the conscious and subconscious mind, the emotions, and the will.

   The wonderful thing about Grace -as I'm finding out to my joy!- is that I am not forced to do good works...I now do them because I want to please my Heavenly Father.  I know I will fall short, but it brings no fear with it.  There is no condemnation in it to me.  I simply go before God and confess (state) what the problem is, ask for forgiveness and then it is forgiven and removed as far as the east is from the west.   That's a long way away from me!  It is as if it never happened in His sight.  I know this because His Word promises me of it.
  Who would not want to work hard for a guy like that, eh? 

         So the whole Christian life now becomes a joy instead of burden to carry around as if I was a mule with a huge load on his back.

  Whew!  That is a lot of typing going on there!  haha   But I can tell you this much --- when I started to understand this, when I started to really get this into my heart, it blessed me hugely!   It just took all that old religious junk off of me and threw it away!   Religion is all man made rules.  Grace is life with Jesus.

   Jesus said we are the 'Light of the World."  We are the 'Salt of the Earth."   Lights attract people from the darkness, and salt is a substance that forever changes whatever it is mixed with.  Under Grace I feel like I am finally starting to understand what He meant by this.  I desire to live closer to God now days, not because I should, but because I truly want to.
 What a blessing that is!

   Now having said all that, I sure find myself with a long trail ahead!  lol  Wanting to live right also brings the knowledge that I do not live right!  I am still of the fallen nature, and easily captured by the 'lusts' of this world.  Selfishness, gluttony, all the fleshly delights and pleasures -- how attractive those can be to our 'Flesh" (worldly selves).  But the world's ways are enmity to God.  So now I'm at Rom 12: 1,2 and the renewing of the mind.  Not a chore anymore, not something I have to do, but something I choose to do.  What a huge relief that brings to me. 
 There is Peace is in this.